Leaving your baby in the hands of a new babysitter can be scary. But a little research will ease your mind. Seasoned moms and experts share their tips for finding a sitter whom you and your child will love.

 

by Bethany Young Hardy

Nearly every handbook on parenting children will tell you that setting aside time for evenings out with just your spouse will do wonders for your relationship and your sanity. But for many new parents, the anxiety that comes with that first night away from baby can put a big damper on the experience.

I remember my first few nights out with my husband after my son (now age 3) was born. We spent the whole evening talking about him, wondering how he was doing, and calling the sitter every hour on the hour to make sure he hadn’t developed some mysterious illness or choked on his teething biscuit.

So what’s a frazzled first-time parent to do? I asked for sitter-seeking tips from experts and some seasoned moms in the greater Washington, D.C. area. A summary of what I found shows that it’s pretty simple. Just follow these steps to find a babysitter that you and your child will love.

1. Use your networks. Having a good relationship with the families in your neighborhood allows you to tap into a babysitter in your own backyard—literally. I’ve been fortunate to find two babysitters in one family that happens to live two doors down from me.

But what if you don’t know your neighbors, or what if they don’t have sitter-aged children? Think about other social networks you belong to, says Alexandra Voigt, a mom of two from Arlington, Virginia.

“We've had great luck through our church,” she says. “We know the families and their character, and our kids get to know the sitters extremely well.”

Listserves for various civic or parenting groups offer other valuable options. “I use [my local mothers’ group’s list serve] for almost all of my local babysitting needs. I save posts from people looking for more hours, or from people posting about their great babysitter, and when in need, I turn to that resource,” says Maria Berthoud, a mother of one from Arlington, Virginia.

I, too, utilized a listserve to find a babysitter. My son’s preschool provides a parents’ discussion board on topics ranging from community service projects to yard sales. I found a great sitter upon the recommendation of a fellow family that posted information about a wonderful young woman who had recently moved into the basement they sublet in their house.

2.  Look to the web. In the age of the internet, virtually any kind of service can be found with the click of a mouse, and babysitters are no exception. Sites like Care.com and Sittercity.com provide updated information on available babysitters by region, complete with background checks, references, and other pertinent information.

“We have used Sittercity.com since moving to Richmond, Virginia—away from family,” says Kristine Saylor, a mother of two. “Sittercity.com has given us four to five very good babysitters…I was looking for a babysitter [again] this summer and had over 15 applicants for the position, all very qualified, most being college students who were pursuing degrees in special education or elementary education.”

M.K. Yeargin of Arlington, Virginia, also sings Sittercity.com’s praises:  “We joined the site when our son was very young and found a wonderful babysitter who is an elementary school teacher. I have since found several other sitters through the site and been able to run background checks on folks before meeting them.”

SitterCity.com also comes in handy when you are on the road, Yeargin adds. “I used it when I traveled to a cousin's wedding in South Carolina,” she recalls. “The sitter there runs a daycare and was absolutely fantastic with my son. It was really nice to be able to use a resource we could trust in an unfamiliar place.”

3.  Ask all the right questions—not just the easy ones. Naturally, when selecting a babysitter, parents want to be absolutely certain that their child is in safe hands. While not every emergency can be anticipated beforehand, it’s important to ask questions to determine the sitter’s approach to handling potentially life-threatening situations. And even if it makes you uncomfortable, you must go beyond simply asking for references, or whether a sitter is CPR-trained.

In fact, you owe it to your child to find out how a sitter will react when his or her temper is put to the test, says Danielle Goldyn, research and prevention coordinator for the Shaken Baby Syndrome Prevention Campaign at The Children’s Hospital in Denver.

"When talking with a potential babysitter, be certain to ask if he or she has a plan for when he or she gets frustrated by a crying infant,” she says. “It might be as simple as planning to put the baby in a safe place, like a crib, closing the door and walking away for a moment to calm down before going back to care for the baby again."

 

Bethany Young Hardy is a mom, writer, and public relations consultant. Her experience includes political, nonprofit, and healthcare communications.