The ancient art of storytelling captivates the imagination of a child as much today as it did long before the written word. Everyone loves a good tale, true or invented. And when relayed from parent to child, it becomes a legacy.

by Joan M. Thomas

Whether a bedtime story or just a response to a question about, say, how dad got his nickname, telling a youngster a story is a splendid form of communication. What’s more, the shared experience can only enhance the child-adult relationship.

How often we see a grown person get misty-eyed when beginning a sentence with something like, “I’ll never forget the story my dad told me about our great uncle Frank…he must have been quite a character.” Learning about our family history, whether famous, notorious or just normal, helps us to understand ourselves. But a good story can also be far-fetched fiction, something children thrive on.

While in high school, I often babysat to earn fun money. One family that frequently called on my services had five rambunctious boys under the age of 10—plus two younger sisters. I learned that the only way to get them all to settle down was to either read them a book or tell them a story. As they had few books in the house, I often just made up a tall tale. It worked to quiet them every time. They may or may not remember me, but I’ll bet they tell such stories to their own offspring.

Several years later while sitting with my sister’s four kids, my rascal nephew Steve questioned how I got my bangle bracelets on my arm (I spread my hand so that he couldn’t pull them off). I made up this yarn about how I woke up one morning and found that they had grown onto my arm. His eyes widened, as he inspected his own little forearm, I guess wondering if the curious condition could be hereditary. That was a harmless little tale, and he soon realized the truth. Today Steve is a successful general contractor and the father of two grown children. And, I am his favorite aunt.

Mark Brandenburg MA, CPCC lists 10 reasons to tell kids stories on his website. One of those points addresses modern families and kids connecting with previous generations. He writes, “In a society that seems to have families spread out all over, it’s vitally important to have ways to have your kids feel connected to their extended families.”

How to find stories to tell

Besides giving an account of how mom and dad met, or fabricating an amusing anecdote such as my bangle story, an adult can always resort to tried and true fairy tales such as The Three Little Pigs. We all know those, and even have our own versions.

Another fun way to tell a tale is to use a prop like a doll or even an animal for the protagonist. There’s no better method to stimulate the imagination of a growing person.

Author Cheri Maude has developed a line of collectible dolls and books of orphan girls who live in a fictional place called Ginger Brook Hollow. Maude says, “Children will often act out thoughts and feelings they are experiencing when they do so through dolls.” Grownups can either create a story about the doll, or encourage the child to do so.

My sister Janice once told me that when she purchased a few prints to liven up the drab walls of the office where she interviewed welfare mothers, she got an unexpected reward. The young women’s children were captivated by those pictures. The subjects were little tykes engaged in activities such as fishing. While Janice spoke with their moms, the kids would invent stories about the drawings’ subjects. “She’s going to catch a fish to bring home for dinner,” one child remarked in matter-of-fact fashion.

Professional polish not needed

It’s not necessary for a grownup to possess an expert storytelling technique, as writer Tom Murphy explains in his 1989 article in Mothering Magazine titled “Telling Make-Believe Stories to Your Children.”

Murphy writes, “The most exciting aspect of parental storytelling is that when we tell our own stories to our children, the quality of the story is less important than the quality of the experience itself.” He also observes that telling your own stories draws the family together and creates vivid “snapshot” memories and special family mythologies.

My nephew Steve likely relates the bangle story about his eccentric aunt to his daughter Jill, who is now about the same age as I was when I told it to him. His mom, my sister, tells her grandchildren how their dad (or uncle) awed his classmates at school the next day during Show and Tell when he related how his Aunt Joan sprouted bracelets right out of her arm!  (I confess, the teacher called his mom to inquire where he got such a tale. My sister mildly reprimanded me.) Today it’s something we can all share as part of our legacy.

It’s one of those links that strengthen our family relationships. My spending the time with my young nephew telling a story forged that link.

 

The author of three books, freelance writer and historian Joan M. Thomas also enjoys writing feature stories and essays on current topics. Born in Carroll, Iowa, she now lives in St. Louis, Missouri, with her husband, Bob, and canine pal, Sasha.

This popular article was originally published in St. Louis Parent newspaper.

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